When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Basic issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t a denying that sober curiosity has elevated just lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and inspecting their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. In the present day we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re fascinated by a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I believe it’s a really private resolution, however when you’re any type of a daily drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other means. In the event you’re not consuming in the course of the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the prospect to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her guide, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for a minimum of 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely will not be doable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any concept how shitty you actually really feel while you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It normally takes just a few weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually depends upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see when you might make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or have been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you recognize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is admittedly what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In the event you spend a variety of time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which ends up in a variety of “guidelines” round your consuming, you may wish to take a step again.

You won’t even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply develop into a part of your interior chatter. That chatter may sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No arduous alcohol in the course of the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my consuming have been crammed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that have been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down day by day, and that type of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You may simply determine that it’s now not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I should not have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions ought to be explored when fascinated by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the assumption that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and life like, mannequin to make use of in relation to speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t have to hit any form of a all-time low earlier than you possibly can discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to determine at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In the event you’re able to get sincere with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested in your self, and take the time to reply actually. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our pals have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you will have ideas/suggestions for find out how to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming pals? 

Krysty: You may want to search out new pals – haha. However, critically, if your folks actually respect and help you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definitely may have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You have to work out for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your good friend group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definitely may want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to exchange that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most primary sober individual round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have completely different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a little bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In the event you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s type of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you may wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam